As part of an effort to bring you a series of 'How To…' articles, Kelly Chandler, Director of Wedding Planning at the Bespoke Wedding Company and Director of the UK Alliance of Wedding Planners, talks to Love My Dress about what to consider, before choosing key members of your bridal party.
Do take a moment to add your own thoughts by leaving a comment at the end…
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They say that 'no man/woman is an island' and never is this truer than when planning a wedding.
As a planner myself, I’m very privileged to be a position to get to know the ins and outs of every wedding I work on and I’m always blown away by the generosity of family, friends and guests towards helping to make the day absolutely perfect for the special couple.
Yet there are so many traditions, expectations and specific duties that come with being involved in a wedding and it’s important to choose the right person for the right job. My colleagues and co-conspirators in the field of wedding planning from the UK Alliance of Wedding Planners share some tips here on how to select and build your dream bridal party based on their experiences…
Love My Dress Wedding Blog – Photograph Copyright (c) 2010, Lawson Photography
Full real wedding feature appearing on Love My Dress soon…
Isabel Smith Weddings – www.isabelsmithweddings.co.uk
(1) Problems arising from selecting the wrong groomsmen are so common, it breaks my heart. Often grooms pick their best friends – the ones they like to party with – to be by their side on the big day. However this doesn't mean that they will be any good at remembering to move the flowers from the church to the reception venue, or that they will know what is and isn't appropriate to mention in the speeches.
Love My Dress Wedding Blog – Photograph Copyright (c) 2010, Joanna Wilkinson Wedding Photography
See the full real wedding feature here
By all means, pick one wild card for the comedy value, but overall, be sure to select wisely, bearing in mind the responsibilities that the various roles bring.
Love My Dress Wedding Blog – Photograph Copyright (c) 2010, Lawson Photography
Full real wedding feature appearing on Love My Dress soon…
Flutterfly Events – www.flutterflyevents.com
(2) Choose those that are closest to you at present. Don't feel obliged to ask your friends and family to do the job just because you were a bridesmaid at their wedding. It's your wedding and you shouldn't have any regrets.
Love My Dress Wedding Blog – Photograph Copyright (c) 2010, S6 Photography
See the full real wedding feature here
Helen Carter Weddings – www.helencarterweddings.co.uk
(3) Don’t rush into asking friends to be your bridesmaids and ushers straight away – once you’ve asked someone to be involved you can’t then change your mind, and you don’t want to end up with dozens of attendants!
Love My Dress Wedding Blog – Photograph Copyright (c) 2010, Tino & Pip
Full real wedding feature appearing on Love My Dress soon…
(4) When choosing your bridesmaids, and particularly your chief bridesmaid, think carefully about how involved you want them to be during the planning. If you want someone who you can delegate tasks to you need to make sure you choose someone responsible and who you can trust. Also think about how they will be on the day – if you have a friend who always wants to be in the spotlight, she might not be the best person to have as a bridesmaid!
Love My Dress Wedding Blog – Photograph Copyright (c) 2010, Craig Sanders Photography
Full real wedding feature appearing on Love My Dress soon…
Heading up the Aisle – www.headinguptheaisle.co.uk
(5) Make sure they have all met beforehand, so they are aware of what they need to do for you. Make sure that bridesmaids are aware of their duties by providing a short booklet or file of the timetable of the day and the key bridal party members contact details along with suppliers they may need to liaise with and do this well before the day.
(6) Everyone has an opinion about weddings so the key to less stress is to involve people once decisions have been made. Don't involve too many people in the decision making process but if your mother in law is keen to help, then give her a job to do like sourcing florists for you to see or any other supplier, that way she won't feel left out.
Love My Dress Wedding Blog – Photograph Copyright (c) 2010, Joanna Brown
Full real wedding feature appearing on Love My Dress soon…
(7) When shopping for your bridesmaids dresses, don't bring too many people to the first appointment we recommend just one or two for your first judging panel, once you have narrowed things down then you can call in the rest of the team that way you won't be overwhelmed by too many differences of opinion.
Love My Dress Wedding Blog – Photograph Copyright (c) 2010, Emma Case
Full real wedding feature appearing on Love My Dress soon…
Just Bespoke – www.just-bespoke.com
(8) If you are struggling for who to pick and what roles to give them, make a list of who you want to be involved in your day and their relevant characteristics and strong points and then assign them to their roles that way. One of the key duties of a bridal party is to help the bride and groom with their wedding, both in the build up and on the day.
Love My Dress Wedding Blog – Photograph Copyright (c) 2010, Lawson Photography
Full real wedding feature appearing on Love My Dress soon…
You need to be surrounded by people you can rely on and lean on to help you. If you have too many individuals, don't forget that there are other roles besides bridesmaids/ushers etc for example you could elect for certain individuals to do a reading at the church instead to ensure that they have a role to play.
Love My Dress Wedding Blog – Photograph Copyright (c) 2010, Devlin Photos
Full real wedding feature appearing on Love My Dress soon…
Carmen Weddings – www.carmenweddings.co.uk
(9) Consider your budget before choosing your bridal party. The more bridesmaids you have, the more it will cost you. If you decide you would like your bridal party to pay for their own attire, make it known at the start.
(10) Make the jobs fun. If you need help in putting together favours, arrange a girly night together with a few drinks and nibbles.
Love My Dress Wedding Blog – Photography Copyright (c) 2010, Monika Magiera
Thanks so very much to all those that contributed to this feature.
Have you any feedback, suggestions or ideas to contribute of your own? Do leave a comment below and share your thougths, it would be great to hear from others…
For further information, visit the Bespoke Wedding Company and the UK Alliance of Wedding Planners.
Annabel xXx
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Annabel View all Annabel's articles
Founder of Love My Dress. Passionate Podcaster and Editor. Annabel lives in rural North Yorkshire with her husband and business partner Philip, their two daughters and menagerie of furry hounds. She loves photography, meditation, walking, being outdoors and star gazing. She is fierce when it comes to championing talent within the wedding industry and when she's not working on Love My Dress, she supports her husband Philip in the running of the family's sustainable flower farm and floral design business, Moonwind Flowers. In 2013, she became a published author.
