Hello again, since I was last here a month has gone by. In my former life, before I was planning a DIY wedding, a month could pass by and I’d barely even notice but these days it would seem that every second counts. So, with less than two months to go I would like to say that most things are in hand and this is partly due to the fact that we have just started to say the occasional ‘yes please’ to all of the generous offers of help from our friends and family.
Purple Door Props + Amii and her fiance David, photo by Devlin Photos
Carlie my Maid of Honour and all-round wonder-woman has been such a massive support to both of us, from liaising with suppliers on our behalf, to helping us hand-ombré 100 white napkins. Aided that day by both glorious sunshine and Wizard of Oz-esque winds, we literally could not have done this without her.
From the start both of us really wanted to make everything really personal to us, so it was always important to us to do everything ourselves and where we weren’t able to, make sure that we utilised the brimming talent from Brighton and I’m happy to say, so far, so good.
Spottswood Photography via Wedding Chicks + Giottes via le Paper Studio on Pinterest
I suppose my top-tip with hindsight and less than two months to go is to accept help whenever it’s offered and don’t be afraid to ask others for help too if no-one is forthcoming. A ‘DIY’ ethos doesn’t have to mean countless sleepless nights covered in glitter and PVA glue with a to-do list as long as your arm, with the danger of sounding life a sub-par self-help book, a problem shared really is a problem halved.
Both images by Stephanie Messick (via herecomestheguide.com)
So with a fairly meticulous plan in our heads and a staunch manifesto ensuring we were pulling our weight, both of our parents started to mention to us:
“Well how will you cope, you know, on the actual day? You can’t be running around after people…”
Now, I mean my response to both sets was a blasé:
“Oh, it’ll be fine, don’t worry…”
But under my air of confidence, in my head I was thinking, how will we cope? How can we make sure everyone has a lovely time without actually running everything ourselves.
To be quite honest I’d been thinking this for a while but had been putting it to the back of my mind, favouring ticking the things off my list that I could actually achieve rather than address this huge gulf that was worrying me more and more, and then I met Liv.
Clayton Austin (via Green Wedding Shoes) + flower garland by LilleSyster on Etsy
Liv, aka Nitty Gritty Events is essentially our knight in shining armour, coming armed with a questionnaire and a clipboard she asked us all the right questions and came up with solutions to the ones that we couldn’t answer. She is effortlessly organised and nothing is ever too much trouble and I really am so happy that we’ve met her. Her story was quite similar to mine when we compared weddings, she thought she could ‘do everything herself’ too and then at the last minute had a wobble and she said hiring an On-the-day co-ordinator was the best decision she made. Just knowing that Liv is there holding our hand on the day is already making me sleep better.
I think it makes a difference too because our venue is just a little village hall in the middle of nowhere, so as wonderfully accommodating as the lovely Michele at Copsale Hall has been, it’s a part-time endeavour for her and they aren’t used to managing weddings.
Image source Griottes
As much as this really appealed to me at the start, a blank canvas where we can have whatever we like and aren’t tied to suppliers and decorations, it did start to become daunting when suppliers were asking how they could contact the venue beforehand and I had to tell them to contact me instead!
Well, this is in danger of turning into an Oscar’s acceptance speech isn’t it! I suppose my parting shot is, it’s OK to ask for help, that doesn’t mean you’ve failed and that on-the-day co-ordination is worth its weight in gold and eye cream (be gone sleepless night eye bags!) If any readers have experience of late-stage planning and some pearls of wisdom to offer me, I would be forever grateful!
Love Amii x
I love the images you’ve chosen to go with your post Amii, they’re so bright, cheerful and creative! Glad everything is under control and I’m sure your friends and family are only delighted to be involved (within reason, of course!).
It’s great to hear your positive experiences of working with an on-the-day coordinator too, we’ve just taken the leap and put a deposit down on one ourselves. Living abroad, we wanted to be able to spend the few days before the wedding catching up with family, rather than frantically running around and I hope working with a co-ordinator will help with that (a little!).
Aisling x
Good call Aisling – I know that a lot of folk balk at the idea of recruiting a wedding planner, but an on-the-day co-ordinator is an ACE idea!
Totally get the ‘every second counts’ panic with only 4 months til our own big day! Trying my best to keep a lid on it but I think wobbles are inevitable!!
Have recently wondered about on-the-day coordinator…it really bothers me that the organisation will fall to one of my lovely family members. Ours is a village hall DIY day too – lots of bits and pieces to sort before guests arrive, so I may look into it further now!
Good luck with the final countdown!
Heidi xx
I honestly think you should look into the costs Heidi! Hiring an on-the-day Co-ordinator could save you such a great deal of stress in the run up and on the day itself xx
I had the same realisation recently too! I’m used to planning events so I’m not really worrying about that but then I realised that I’m usually busy doing things at the event & this won’t be possible on our wedding. We’re getting married in our garden, then moving to a restaurant, then moving to our local town hall for the evening reception. I have loads of ideas for decorating our garden but then thought who is going to put everything away/take it to the reception venue when we go to the restaurant?! I can’t believe I didn’t realise this before. There aren’t any wedding planners or on-the-day coordinators where we live. Bit of a puzzle at the moment!
One of the things I really do wish we had done for our wedding was to hire an on the day coordinator- our venue wasn’t quite as DIY as yours, but even so, it would have been a massive sigh of relief to have had someone else responsible for all the questions and last minute organisational things- my lovely friends and family pitched in and were stars, but a designated professional would have been so much better! Everything sounds like its going really well Amii- I can’t wait to see the photos! S xx
Thank you all so much for your comments! And yes Heidi and Aisling I couldn’t recommend ‘on-the-day’ coordination more. It’s good to know that even if you’re a control freak, which I am embarrassingly, that someone else can set up your vision when you’re busy doing that important bit of actually getting married and take those awkward last minute supplier phone calls. They also ask you those questions that you may have forgotten.
I honestly left our meeting going from:
“OH GOD, I’ve got so much to do”
to “oh wow David, this is going to be so much fun”
And Florence, I completely empathise, I’m always the one organising and flitting around normally so I wasn’t worried at first and naturally budget was a consideration. We took ages finding Liv so don’t give up hope, I’d recommend asking friends for recommendations and also maybe some other suppliers as they might know of someone. It’s tough because I knew that someone like my Maid of Honour would have been amazing at it but she obviously couldn’t do it and then anyone we were directly friends with was a guest!
xx