Hello readers, it really has been a while since I last blogged, four months to be exact, but hopefully you all caught Sam’s post about life as a groom back in June. We have been very busy bees since then, with both wedding and non-wedding business; I graduated in July, and then went to Paris with friends, Portugal with Sam and Florida with my new employers.
Starting a full time job at the beginning of September has given me a new admiration for working brides-to-be. How on earth do you manage it?! While I was at University, I could stroll into mid-week dress appointments, spend hours scrolling through pins and watch back-to-back episodes of Four Weddings. Now that 5 days a week are essentially write-offs I find myself forgetting that the wedding is quietly creeping up behind us.
Fortunately, we became wedding planning machines over the summer knowing that the luxury of free time was reaching its expiry date, so we have managed to get a lot done. The most exciting development for me has been finally saying yes to a dress! I honestly didn’t think the moment would come, and had at least two bad dreams about still trying to find a dress while guests were arriving on the day of our wedding.
In total I tried on more than thirty dresses in seven different boutiques, the one I eventually chose was about the 25th one I tried on. My search took me to some amazing places, including a gorgeous boutique in Paris called Metal Flaque; being buttoned into a Monique Lhuillier gown by a French assistant was a very surreal feeling, but it is definitely an experience to tick off the bucket list and was helped by the fact that Alexandra was one of the loveliest assistants ever.
Throughout the search I often found that I would fall in love with a dress online, but when I tried it on, I just looked ridiculous. On the other hand, there were dresses that suited me well, but I just didn’t feel anything towards them when I put them on. After trying on so many, you start to think that feeling okay about a dress will be enough to seal the deal; I was starting to get to that point when I stumbled across the dress I finally went for.
A friend and I had actually picked the dress out as a wild card, and if I had gone by the pictures online I wouldn’t have bothered to give it a chance. But when I tried it on, it was the first time that I had felt excited by a dress and it suited my shape perfectly. Anyone who is a serial wedding TV show watcher (like me) will have seen brides in floods of tears when they find the dress of their dreams. When I found my dress, I wasn’t suddenly overcome with emotion and it wasn’t until I had tried on a few more dresses that it hit me that I had already found the one.
With hindsight, I’ve realised that part of the reason that I took a while to commit to a dress is because I was holding out for that dramatic and overwhelming feeling of ‘knowing’ that I’d seen on TV. I also think wedding dress shopping had almost become an addiction, to the point where I wouldn’t have been satisfied until I had been to every boutique in the northern hemisphere at least twice.
Thankfully, Valerie at All That Glitters in Wimbledon helped me to take the step I needed. So now I have a beautiful wedding dress, and I am ready to let go of the Pinterest board full of maybe-dresses that I will never need to try on.
Another decision that Sam and I made recently was to hire an on-the-day coordinator. It was an idea that we had toyed with for a little while, but we decided that being able to wake up on the day knowing that everything is being taken care of and just enjoy spending time with our friends and family was a priority. When we spoke to Sama of Utterly Wow and saw the awesome weddings in her portfolio, we immediately felt like our wedding would be in safe hands if she was involved, so it didn’t take us long to book her up for the day. She’s already made us consider important things that hadn’t even crossed our minds! We are both genuinely looking forward to having her as part of our wedding.
That’s all from me for now, are there any other self-confessed dress search addicts out there? I’d love to hear from you.
Love to you all,
Kay x
it doesn’t end with the wedding! I’m still dress obsessed and I’m two weeks away from my 1st anniversary! I was even tempted to accept the offer of boutique assistant at the shop I finally purchased my dress from in the hope it was satisfy my lusting after tulle, lace & silk!!
Hehe! I will *always* be dress obsessed Kirsty! 😉
xx
Had exactly the same experience when looking for a dress – so glad you found the one! I went to at least 7 different shops in 3 different countries (UK, Spain, Germany) and, like you, found a big difference between what I thought I wanted from photographs and what felt right. Fastforward 6 months and I went back to the first boutique which is actually a dressmaker. I had tried on a dress there for fun but had initially dismissed it because it didn’t feel ‘weddingy’. I’m now getting that dress made (with a few differences) completely from scratch – getting to chose the fabric and everything! I’m so glad I didn’t resign myself to being ‘okay’ with a dress – wedding shows have a lot to answer for by building up that ‘it’s the one!’ moment!!!
I think it’s such an important message that quite often, what you think won’t work from having seen it in a mag or on TV or hanging from the rails even, can actually look amazing once it’s on.
I actually sold the first dress I got (which was the first dress I tried on – lesson there!) and went for something different having visited about 4 boutiques and tried on maybe 15 dresses myself. Like you SLB, I’m so happy I didn’t resign myself to just being OK with the dress. I remember the day I’d found my dress and driving back home on the motorway absolutely HIGH As a kite that I’d found ‘the one’ 🙂
Congratulations on finding your dress! Reading your experience of the whole process has really resonated with me. I’m not the most decisive person, but had I not been waiting for that ‘this is the one’ movie-moment I think I would have found dress hunting far less stressful, and been happy to make a decision much sooner. I’ve just calculated that I’ve tried almost 50 dresses over the past 5 months and, like you, whilst there have been plenty that have suited me I’ve just not been blown away by them. There’s one dress that’s now top of my list but there are a few tweaks I’d like to make to it (which the designers are happy to do luckily) that I think will make it perfect for me. The only problem with this is that I won’t get to try my ‘one’ until it’s actually made, but I suppose that’s no different to ordering based on a sample dress that’s 4 sizes too big anyway!
Oops, rant over! Well done again on taking that final step to committing to your dress, and for being honest about how you got to that stage – it makes such a refreshing (and reassuring) change from the fairytale ‘norms’ perpetuated on TV! xx
I hope the dress is everything you hope for Kirstie! See my previous comment about actually selling the first wedding dress I got (there’s a story in that actually – based on a bad customer service experience which tainted the whole dress for me and would have reminded me of how poor a service I received had I worn it on my wedding day – might blog about that soon actually!).
Anyway, thanks for taking time to leave a comment Kirstie – very much appreciated,
Love Annabel xXx
I’m so pleased you found The One Kay! Like you I really struggled to find a dress (honestly the amount of dresses I tried on became a running joke in my family) – but the one I decided on was the one that I felt most like myself in; just the best version of myself. Like you I didn’t have an overwhelming ‘knowing’ moment at any boutique, but my thoughts kept returning to that dress and how happy it made me which is ultimately how I made my decision. I’m sure you’re going to look amazing in your dress and you can relax now in the knowledge that your wedding is in good hands by hiring a co-ordinatior! Looking forward to hearing more updates and congrats on your new job! Madeleine xx
Madeleine, or should I call you Mrs Madeleine! I can’t wait to see the dress you chose, I’m sure you looked absolutely stunning. I think feeling like youself, but the best version of youself is exactly how it should be. When I showed my bridesmaids the dress the first thing they said is ‘it’s very you’, I definitely knew I had made the right choice after that! xx
Madeleine, or should I call you Mrs Madeleine! I can’t wait to see the dress you chose, I’m sure you looked absolutely stunning. I think feeling like myself, but the best version of myself was the main thing I was looking for in a perfect dress. When I showed my bridesmaids the dress, the first thing they said is ‘it’s very you’, I definitely knew I’d made the right choice after that! xx