One Year On: The Thrills (And Bills) of the Paper Anniversary

I witnessed the most beautiful sight on my daily walk to the beach the other day. A sweet, and very loved-up, couple were declaring how much they already missed each other, clinging on tight, not wanting to let go. After a significant amount of eavesdropping (the journalist in me is always looking for a story), I was determined that the couple were about to spend the night apart, for tomorrow was their wedding day. Immediately, I was transported right back to the time when I said goodbye to my fiancé the day before we became married.

You can just picture what happened the second I arrived home. Out came the wedding album, tears of happiness spilling forth as I I poured over the images and recalled memories of all the silly, special, funny, serious, sad and happy times. Then I suddenly realised it’s coming up to our one-year anniversary, which got me thinking about just how much we’ve achieved since that magical late Summer’s day in September 2014.

In the build up to our wedding day, my husband (and it still feels fantastic to be able to say those words) and I held regular ‘Planning Saturdays’. with copious amounts of coffee and enthusiasm, we did about four hours of intensive activities to update suppliers, sort out favours, work out table plans and all those wee little details. I was most impressed, not only because my husband-to-be was just as excited about the planning as me (in truth, he kept me on track) but for the fact that these busy Saturdays drew us closer together even closer. I had an epiphany – I had found myself a very, very good egg.

Now, ten months later, we are settling into our new home near the beach, having relocated from the UK to my hometown of Wollongong, Australia. We’re a few minutes from the water, the most beautiful sandy beaches, and the loveliest little local café who has our regular coffee order ready within minutes. We have a wonderful base of friends and family and hubby loves his new life in Oz – and I love re-connecting with the place I grew up in and am so proud to call home again.

We lived in the newlywed bubble for a few months after the wedding – a beautiful bubble I’d like to think will never burst – but, of course, reality soon hit. The honeymoon and wedding was officially over, and instead there were bills to pay, my new husband’s shift working pattern to work around so we didn’t pass like ships in the night, and both of us finding our feet as we settled into a new life together as Mr and Mrs.

Me on my wedding day
(Gary Roebuck Photography)

One of the ways we found to cope with this initial feeling of utter post-wedding deflation was replacing our Wedding Planning Saturdays with Life Planning activities instead, ie, working out logistics for the new upcoming adventure of uprooting our lives in Surrey and trekking Down Under. And so began the job searches, flat hunting, researching the (extortionate) costs of bread and milk, and hubby’s favourite, ‘top tips for staying cool in an Aussie summer!’. Doing these activities helped us immensely and gave new focus and fresh eyes to the beginning stages of our marriage.

I pose these questions then to our newlywed Love My Dress readers: How did you find this period of transition as a new bride or groom? Did you have to work on compromises? Has the bubble burst? Do you miss planning your wedding and ticking off the to-do-list? And do you find yourself, like me, experiencing completely random episodes where you look at your new life partner and squeal with excitement that you’re actually married (and, let’s be honest now, feel very happy at the thought of not having to go on the dating scene again?!).

I’d love to hear your thoughts and experiences as you muddle through the slightly murky, yet wonderful, waters of the first year of marriage. Just this morning I was playing some music on the sound system and on came our wedding favour soundtrack. Cue tears at the lovely, happy memories of walking down the aisle to the hauntingly beautiful tune of ‘Now We Are Free’ from the Gladiator movie. This moment meant so much and signified a lot of clarity for me. I’d finally found ‘the one’ who completely gets me, quirks and all, and who I can support and help start afresh as we experience together the bumpy, yet exhilarating ride that is marriage and adventure called life.

And we make sure, every week, that we follow the very sound advice of lovely Tippy and George, whose twenty-year vow renewal featured earlier this year on Love My Dress:

As for keeping the marriage going, it has been said before but I would highly recommend that couples keep dating. Whether you are a year into your marriage or twenty years like us it’s always good to go out – for a concert, a stroll, coffee or just to catch a movie. Spend some ‘us’ time together. Take the extra effort. Even when George and I are busy working we would sometimes meet at the end of the day to catch a movie or grab dinner before going home. We still go on dates and have weekends away together – just us. (Tippy, Love My Dress reader)

I’d love to throw out a huge love and congratulations to those readers who will be celebrating their first anniversary shortly. I just googled ‘first year anniversary presents for him’ and discovered a range of options: I can go with traditional paper, or perhaps the modern suggestion of plastic, or even ‘alternate modern’ with a clock. I’m thinking something plastic-ey and gadget-ey will be right up his alley. Perhaps?